Thursday, 13 October 2011

148, Shark Night 3D

Lets make this completely simple and clear from the start.

This is by far, without doubt or indeed question the worst ever movie I have seen make it onto the big screen.

I promise to take up as little of your time as physically possible with this blog as it actually bores me to write it but there are some things you should know if one of your mates says, "Who fancies watching Shark Night Tonight?"

Pay Attention!

Firstly, the only high point.  It has got Joel David Moore in it (Bones, Avatar) who I love!!  But that's it.

The rest of the cast, albeit cute - are useless.  As with Piranha 3D, they focused on looks rather than talent but being a cert 15 - in Shark Night we get to see neither!

Now the Sharks.  If I said Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus had better special effects I would not be far wrong.  Lame, dull & boring.  This belongs on the "Movies 24" channel or at a push, Sy-Fy.  Certainly not on your multiplex and I am ashamed at you Mr Cinema Manager for letting this replace Warrior!!!  Bad Cinema Manager.  You should resign immediately!

Now the plot.  You guessed it, Poor.  I cant even begin to explain it but lets just say a few of the swamp locals feel that "realising" Shark Week on the discovery channel can make them some quick cash so breed, feed and raise sharks to hunt on unknowing holiday makers.  Oh Dear.

Its just wrong, not only to charge to upwards of £7 to see this but another £1.50 for 3D and even more if you don't have glasses - plus drinks and sweets that's an easy £15 each to sit through complete dribble.

That's it - no more.  See it at your own risk.